Not your average suburban mom. I’m more your typical, normal, commonplace, everyday, garden-variety suburban mom. With a thesaurus.

Friday, January 18, 2013

"Some women are dripping with diamonds ..." - Miss Hannigan

Little girls
Little girls
Everywhere I turn I can see them
Facebook Friday!  Today is dedicated to my girlies.  I love 'em.  The good Lord gave me three in a row.  They constantly remind me to call my mom and apologize for my entire childhood that girls are aptly described as "sugar and spice and everything nice" because "drama and glitter and princess dresses" just doesn't have the same flow.

Here are some of my facebook statuses involving the Estrogen Clan at my house.

Facebook Statuses = From the Mouths of Future Babes Edition

Eve: It's not. It's perspiration. It's when the moisture in the air hits your cold cup.
Kelly: You mean condensation.
Eve: Yeah, condensation.

Esther: "Discreet" means don't tell anybody when you are about to go to the potty.

Eve and I ran into the sunrise a bit during our morning run. Her reaction? "Dude. Seriously, Sun? I'm trying to run here." Yep. It's official. She's my daughter.

Reason #327 I love my nine year old: Every time Eve makes a stupid joke she follows it with a vocal rimshot.

The children are peacefully watching Dinosaur Train while they eat a self-prepared breakfast of Pop-Tarts and granola bars.
Hosanna: Hey Mom - we're gonna call you Maiasaurus because it means the "good mother lizard." That's totally you.
I'm the Good Mother Lizard. Pop Tarts and D.T. It's a morning win for all involved.

Because just in case I didn't get the message every single time I turn on the radio, Esther constantly reminds me at home that Taylor Swift is never, ever, ever getting back together with her ex-boyfriend. Like, ever.

"Will somebody PLEASE get some coffee for mom?!" - Esther

Have a great weekend and I'll see y'all Monday!


  1. The last one is my favorite. That is hysterical! And I know I say it every Friday, but I'm so jealous of your Facebook witticism. Teach me your ways!

    1. How did I miss this comment? Thanks, Katie!

  2. I was just thinking, "the last one is my favorite" and then saw I wasn't the only one :) You are raising hilarious girls! Miss seeing you at Friday morning classes.

    1. I was just thinking about you the other day - I'm missing visiting on Friday mornings!

  3. Hey new to your blog.
    Your girl have a great sense of humour :)

  4. Just read that you lost 100 pounds. Wohoo. I love the way you write. Now I knwo where the girls get the humour from ;)

    1. Thanks, Z! Welcome and thanks for the compliments. I know you from commenting on Katie's blog! Glad to have you here as well :)

  5. Ha. Your kids crack me up. But then again, they are YOUR kids. ;)


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