Not your average suburban mom. I’m more your typical, normal, commonplace, everyday, garden-variety suburban mom. With a thesaurus.

Monday, July 7, 2014

The time I threw up Redneck all over my blog

I hope everyone had a fun safe Fourth of July filled with FREEDOM and bald eagle sightings. My holiday Facebook feed was filled in equal measures with pictures of pyromaniac celebrations and of animals quaking in their thundershirts (accompanied by pet-owner rants of the evils of personal firework displays). The Sublurban Mama household mirrored the conflicting views found on Facebook with the Matriarch of the homestead having an affinity for keeping all the digits God gave her and her offspring, and the Patriarch believing that the slight possibility of dismemberment is worth the rapturous joy of blowing crap up.

Below is actual real life footage of the festivities that took place at our home this past weekend. Neighbor Don was innocently trying to capture the cute little display he had going on in his driveway when, four seconds in, you can hear him remark, "They have four," and Brian's show begins. So really, we videobombed their home videos. (Haha. We literally bombed them.)(And almost our minivan.) Here is 17 seconds of the longest night of my life other than labor.


(Brian's response to this post: "Kel, you know the only reason I put on that show was so you would have something to blog about, right?" Totally, honey. I could tell it was a huuuuuuge sacrifice.)

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