Not your average suburban mom. I’m more your typical, normal, commonplace, everyday, garden-variety suburban mom. With a thesaurus.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013


Old:  [ohld] adjective, old·er, old·est OR eld·er,eld·est, noun

1. far advanced in the years of one's or its life: an old man; an old horse; an old tree.
2. of or pertaining to the latter part of the life or term of existence of a person or thing: old age.
3. as if or appearing to be far advanced in years: Worry had made him old.

I think one of the key signs of aging is that it becomes a job to keep up with pop culture. When I was younger, pop culture was something I inherently understood; what was cool was cool to me, what was fashionable I incorporated with relative ease, and I recognized new artists before they hit Top 40 radio.

Lately I've been noticing this all change.  Sure, I'm still pretty awesome for 34, but that awesomeness takes a lot of time and effort.  Often, even after all the research and development that comes from HOURS on Pinterest I find myself befuddled at the appeal of many of today's most popular styles, music, and technology.  Conclusion?  I'm getting Old.

Recently I was out with the kiddos and came across a vanity license plate that said "BEPRSNT".  I immediately sighed and grew tired.  I mean, it obviously read "Bep-re-zhent" which was surely some kind of new hip-hop Pig Latin for "represent" that was going to take me hours on Urban Dictionary to decode.  I'm pretty fluent in hip-hop* which alone is a foreign language, but to add some kind of funky Pig Latin twist (never mastered as a child)(so ashamed)(on what foolishness did I waste my youth?) just seems cruel. Cut a suburban mom some slack, homie. (I'm thisclose to being current with most my phat knowledge.)

*I'm not at all.

Ice Cube knows what I'm sayin'.

It was while I was feeling overwhelmed at the prospect of adding "mastering weird Pig Latin hip-hop hybrid" to my already full to-do list that 10 year old Eve chimed in from the back seat.

"Hey, Mom, check out that license plate.  BE PRESENT.  You know, like live in the moment.  Don't worry and stuff.  That's cool."

Bep-re-zhent.  Be present.

Two kinds of people.

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  1. Ha!! I would've been right there with you, scratching my head and muttering to myself!!

  2. I am mentally incapable of reading vanity plates. My brain just won't work that way. I feel your pain.

  3. hah! I'm with you. My youngest sister told me she was taking pics of herself and sending them on "snap chat". I looked at her like she was an alien and said "that's not a real thing". Me = ancient to a 14 year old!


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