95. 155. 165. The BootKemp Sessions - June

You wanna piece of Kemper?
Find him here.

Another month and another in-person training session with Kemper. Yes, there are pictures this time. Of me. Lifting a giant tire while I pretend Elliott Hulse's camera people are filming me. They are as lovely as you can imagine. And yes, I will post them.

You're welcome.

THE homemade chocolate cake.
And Esther.
Which one is sweeter? You decide.
(One is legit louder, though. No contest.)

I woke up incredibly early Friday in anticipation of my training session that night. I drank as much water as possible to flush out my birthday feast (update - I went for the bison burger instead of the black bean)(it was meh - the black bean burger is going to be hard to top)(unless you top it with the house-made red pepper mayo, spring mix, tomato, and red onion)(*insert rimshot here*). I felt the day craaaaawwwl by* as I waited for my dad in law to come over and babysit so I could head out.

(*A mid-morning playdate with my friend Jenny totally helped. She brought her girlies over with the plan to walk to the splash park, but it was chilly and raining when they arrived so instead we broke out the playdoh because I clearly wasn't thinking about five children under the age of six using playdoh.)

Due to fear about new road closures and traffic woes, I gave myself extra time for travel and arrived at Kemper's house really early. Instead of sitting in my car and working on the grocery list like I'd planned, I had to bum rush Kemper's door because mommy bladder. In my haste to get to the bathroom I *did* take a moment to appreciate that Kemper had Rage Against the Machine playing in the gym. He totally prepared for my session.

Since I was so early I had a few minutes to meet the family. I think most of Kemper's family has read my blog when he has been the star of the show. I've "talked" with his mom via Facebook comments before, and I full on proposed to his brother, so yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm invited to Christmas this year. Or at the very least I'll be included in the family portrait.

Kemper has a great family. They are the kind of people whose home you immediately feel at home in. They all genuinely like each other. I have been blessed in my life to know a few families who have really done it right. The parents put in the time and fought every fight during those hella hard hands-on parenting years in order to raise loving, happy, successful adults who still desire a relationship with their parents and siblings.

Kemper's parents are some of those people.

Because I'm a trained musician.

I could have stayed and talked forever. His mom and dad are so encouraging, and his older brother Oscar (who is super fine and single, ladies) has a degree in music just like me. In fact, the whole family is musical - his mom sings, his dad plays bass, Oscar plays guitar, Kemper is a drummer, and his little sister plays piano. There will be a collaborative jam session in our future. (I will contribute vocals and random offbeat air drumming.)(Although? My air drumming is about 95% passion and 5% rhythm, which is definitely the proper ratio of an excellent air drummer.)


Kemper started our session with a quick chat about my strength training. I have been building a strength base and am ready to get stronger. Kemper wanted to take a few minutes to get my max lifting weights for a few lifts - bench press, squat, and deadlift - before he put together a 4-6 week individualized plan to turn me into a meathead get me some gainz.

After a warm up, I did some stretches with bands to get my shoulders ready to bench press, and then the real fun began.

I have done bench press less than five times in my whole life. Trainer Dan taught me a few weeks ago, and then Trainer Mike did them with me twice. I've never benched more than 65 pounds and that felt seriously heavy. Kemper went over proper bench press form, stressing to keep my entire body tight to support the lift. He showed me how to pull my shoulder blades together, where to place my hands on the bar, and how to breathe. He had me do the empty bar a few times, and then, in true Kemper style, he started piling on weight.

Guys? I benched 95 pounds.

Just victims of the in-house drive by
They say jump squat, you say how high low.

After bench press came SQUATTING. Kemper taught me to squat about five weeks ago. The most I have ever squatted is 115 pounds. But with a little help from Kemper standing behind me saying things like, "Power!", "Push!", and "Keep your core tight!" (and, I kid you not, Bullet In The Head perfectly cued up for my heaviest lift*) I squatted 155 - twice.

(*After squatting Kemper and I had the most adorable conversation that was a totally fitting way to celebrate the day after my 35th birthday. It went something like this.

-The fifth most awesome song comes on-

Kelly: This is the best music. Did you find some "alternative hits of the 90s" station?
Kemper: Yeah. It's called Gorilla Radio. (Guerilla Radio?)
Kelly: Do you know any of these songs?
Kemper: I know some of the Rage Against the Machine songs because we covered a few of their songs. (Because he's a drummer, remember?)
Kelly: But nothing else? (Guys, there was some totally classic stuff played: Beastie Boys, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, etc.)
Kemper: Not really. It was a bit before my time.

Kemper is 22.
And I'm officially old.)

Even with feeling ancient by the time we got to deadlifting I felt like the most powerfully strong aged 35 year old stay at home mother on Kemper's block IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. I was so full of jacked up energy (and I mean that as a normal adult knows "jacked" and not like a meathead knows "jacked") I just wanted to jump up and down and #liftalltheheavythings FOREVER.

Previous deadlift PR - 125. With Kemper? 165 - twice.

Weight lifting is so seriously addictive. It is the most fun thing I have done in a really long time. More fun than a night with Needtobreathe. There, I said it. (In fact, if you check the dates, I actually missed the Detroit Needtobreathe show because their ticket prices became astronomical in order to go to this very training session.)

I feel amazing when I lift. I feel strong. I feel capable. I constantly feel pushed beyond my comfort level, and I feel there is so much more to learn. I love the effect on both my body and mind. I teenage girl super bubble heart weight lifting.

After Kemper had my max weights written down, we used the rest of the session for a circuit of 6 tire lifts, 30 seconds ropes, 30 seconds rest, repeat 2-3 times. Here, for your viewing pleasure, are the lovely pics Kemper took during our session.

"Hey Kel, did you get that shirt at Costco for the bargain price of $9?"
"Why yes, I certainly did. Because fashionista."
(Also, I love this pic because dat baby tricep and baby calf)

"Kel, I'd feel a lot better if I knew you were exhaling on the lift. Too bad there's no way to check ..."
"Don't you fret, Kemper totally got a pic of my 'breathing out' face."
(dat baby calf and dem NECK VEINS)

I was all sorts of bruised and sore from that tire. I loved it.

"I wish Kelly were so skilled in technological arts that she could only figure out how to take a selfie in the mirror with her iPad. It would be even better if she didn't bother to crop the resulting photo and allowed everyone to see the reflection in the medicine cabinet mirror."
"YOU SHUSH YOUR FACE AND LOOK AT MY GUNS."

Since Friday night, Kemper has emailed me and I now have in my possession a 4-6 week strength training program. It's a 5x5 program and is filled with seriously heavy lifting. I'm not gonna lie, it scares the bejeebers out of me. It intimidates me so much on paper that I can only mentally take one day at a time as I try to work it out. What I'm going to focus on is what is going to happen with my body after 4-6 weeks of following this plan.

I am seriously stoked to find out.

And a side of pizza

Some happenings...

LAUREN had her baby!!! Deborah Rose joined our world June 8, 2014. She was 9 pounds, 1 ounce and has a ton of hair. Lauren is recovering nicely after a horrific birth experience that she will wear like a badge of honor in about five years as soon as the trauma feelings wear off. My first act as Aunt Kelly was to take Deborah's First Selfie. She can mark that milestone in her baby book.

Other milestones with Aunt Kelly will include:
First Barbell Squat
First Iced Coffee
First Needtobreathe Concert

EZRA is striving for the longest stomach bug in the history of our family. He has spent every other night for over a week now throwing up and poo-ing everywhere. This is disgusting and has made me gag on occasion. Thankfully one of the characteristics of motherhood is that once Nasty is out of sight it is out of mind and I can clean up filth one minute and make myself a delicious breakfast in the next. So, yay survival skills. The weirdest thing is that he is only really sick at night. I discovered a lovely little option on our washing machine called "the sanitize cycle." It is keeping me sane.

I subbed veggies for that mushroom
cap. Because I hate mushrooms,
that's why.

MY IN-LAWS returned from Africa!! They have been living there since February 2013, and I've missed them terribly. We picked them up from the airport yesterday afternoon, visited for a few hours, and then ate dinner at Applebee's. (Where I had one of the best steaks of my life.)(Right?)(At APPLEBEE'S?)(I thought the same thing.)

LIFETIME is closed this week for maintenance. Well, just the fitness floor is closed, but since that eliminates all the weights, cardio equipment, and stretching area that pretty much renders Lifetime useless to me. I worked out at my old gym last night and ran into Trainer Tom. He was all, "YOU LOOK GREAT!" and then asked about my body fat percentage. He guessed it accurately (which I'm pretty sure is his trainer parlor trick) and said he could see a huge difference in my body. I was all, "I'm lifting...heavy," and felt like a total bad-A. Good times.

No Butterfinger candy bars were
harmed in the making of this shake.

THE BEST PROTEIN SHAKE I've ever had was made in my blender for lunch. It was seriously amazing. It's not a clean recipe, and is a pretty hefty meal replacement (it was about 440 calories and 42 grams of protein and was HUGE) but it was such an awesome summer "treat". The only thing that could have made it better was a side of pizza a fun twisty straw.

Butterfinger Protein Shake

1 cup milk (any kind will do, but I used cows milk because I needed the calories)

1 cup water

1 scoop chocolate protein powder

1 cup ice

1 TBSP peanut butter

1 TBSP sugar free, fat free butterscotch pudding mix

Blend and inhale. Or savor. Whatever.

These shoes now belong to me. I spent two days thinking about them after trying them on. It took three Kohls adventures to find them in my size. Totally worth the effort. I'm going to wear them with my elephant t-shirt because of course I have an elephant t-shirt. (Because if I was an animal I'd be a Kelephant.)(Haha.)(Not a fat joke.)(Just a hilarious play on words.)

I am going to enjoy another sunny day here in the Mitten. It is supposed to get really hot and I can't wait to let the kiddos run through the sprinkler while I weed the flower beds, wash the car, and wear a tank top. I LOVE SUMMER!

This book may scream "Soccer Mom" but it reads "ROCK STAR PRINCESS"

One of my biggest secret fears is that one day I will be at the gym, doing cardio and listening to my iPod, when a stranger will come up to me mid-workout, pull my sweaty ear buds from my ears, and before I can scream, "NOOOOO!" will stick them in their own ears in order to hear what I am jamming to.  And I will be outed for all the bad music I thoroughly enjoy.

This fear is so ingrained that if a person meanders too closely to my machine I actually reach up and shut down my iPod if the song is embarrassing enough. (I would just skip it but chances are I'm really excited that Julianne Hough is finally singing the medley Sister Christian/Just Like Paradise/Nothin' But a Good Time (from the hit musical Rock of Ages starring Tom Cruise) because I keep my music on random and it's not every day that you get great hits like that.)(Keeping it on shuffle allows me to pretend God is a DJ because I don't keep God in a box, y'all.)

On the outside, while I'm all,

Scorching reservoir?!?! I die.

in the private world kept safe by my ear buds there is a slight chance* I am rocking out to Bad English singing When I See You Smile.  (*there is a 100% chance.  It is totally happening.) (That's how I can face the world.) (Oo-oh)

Sometimes I wanna give up, I wanna give in,
I wanna quit the fight; but then I see you Baby
And everything's alright.
Everything's alright.

Or conversely, I'm being white girl ghetto with Cypress Hill and I Ain't Goin' Out Like That.

"Let's kick it ese

Commin' out tha slums, it's da hoodlums 

I'm pullin' my gat out on all you bums 

So bring it on when you wanna come fight this 

Outlaw, I'll kick ya like Billy Ray Cypress Hill"

My video face is much more angst-y,
Amy Lee.

Other times, while I'm looking 110% committed to my speedwork on the treadmill, I'm really on stage at American Idol tearing it up with my performance of either Evanescence's Call Me When You're Sober or Tracy Bonham's Mother Mother. Occasionally I catch myself looking too hardcore in the mirrors opposite my person, but honestly, it's hard to mask the legendary internal performances that are routinely taking place.  Because? I am that good.

If it's a premenstrual introspective day, I let Anna Nalick sing Breathe (but only until I get in my car and then I own that mess), or the Bangels sing Eternal Flame.  Debbie Gibson also takes a turn with Lost in Your Eyes.  O-Town's All or Nothing just kills me because those are some heartbroken boys who are only asking for some exclusivity in their relationships.  Is that *really* too much to ask?!

"Don't make me promises
Baby you never did know how to keep them well
I've had the rest of you, now I want the best of you,
it's time for show and tell"
Just look at those faces.  How could you, Baby?

I have gotten a bit caught up in the music and accidently air drummed to the following songs while on the treadmill, elliptical, or stationary bike:

Green Day - Longview (I got thrown out of a Green Day concert when I was fifteen.  No joke.  I found myself with my friend Matt standing outside Cobo Hall in Detroit wondering how we were going to get home because all of our friends - and rides home - were still inside the venue because they didn't try to run for the main floor/mosh pit from their balcony seats, get caught by security, and literally thrown out onto the streets.)(P.S. Mom, I will deny this ever happened if you try to talk to me about it.  I am still your favorite angel of a child.)

My Chemical Romance - Welcome to the Black Parade  (I had a four run streak where I pretended to be the drummer for My Chemical Romance the entire run.)

Rage Against the Machine - Killing in the Name (I won't do what you tell me.)

Needtobreathe - the live recording of Prisoner (Actually way more intense than the  studio version.)

Harvey Danger* - Flagpole Sitta (Lyric I loved until I found out they were being ironic hipsters back in 1997 and really making fun of me - "I wanna publish zines, and rage against machines, I wanna pierce my tongue it doesn't hurt it feels fine.")

<3  RIP

Nirvana - Smells Like Teen Spirit (How can you not air drum to this?)(Maybe you're just in a denial, a denial, a denial, a denial, a denial ... )

Beastie Boys - Sabotage (also I forgot where I was and did the dog bark out loud in Sure Shot while on the treadmill)(That's worth about 40,000 Awesome Points if you're keeping score.)

P.O.D. - Boom (here comes the boys from the south)(I saw P.O.D. play in a church gym circa '98-ish.)(A church gym, y'all.)

The Breeders - Cannonball (actually this was accidental air guitar)

*Do you remember Harvey Danger?  They were kinda a big deal in 1997.  And by "big deal" I mean they were on TRL once.  I totally met them in a very "Needtobreathe type moment" where I knocked on their tour bus door outside of St. Andrew's Hall in Detroit and they let me and my friend Megan come inside the bus and interview them for my zine.  Because it was 1998 and I had a zine.  Which was kind of like a blog.  That I typed on a typewriter and printed at Kinko's and distributed at actual record stores.  Because I was DIY and this was before computers were a thing.  Because I'm old.*

I have a ton of music I would like to write about, but I am listening to my iPod as I write this and House of Pain's Jump Around is now blasting in my ear.  I find that I have to sign off and go dance because that song is pretty much a command to move.

Thanks, Babe. It's not all fun and games being a blogger.

Happy Hump Day, y'all.

"I'm Brian, the Other White Meat."

A totally cropped, scrapbooked, un-scrapbooked, and scanned wedding pic.  Keepin' it professional up in here.
Also, tru luv.

The hubs and I are celebrating twelve years of wedded bliss on Sunday.  Twelve years!  We are officially "tweens".  So I suppose we should buy some Bieber bedding. Here is our story.

Shawn - Rock Star Extraordinaire
and Super Cute Boy who is now
married to a gorgeous woman and
has two gorgeous kiddos. Sorry, ladies.

Once upon a time, an awesome teenager named Kelly went to a club to hear bad punk rock.  She was fickle and boy crazy (and had a horrendous haircut) and saw a Super Cute Boy over by the stage.  She made her way over and started talking to this boy.  His name was Shawn and he was pleased to make her acquaintance and oh, she studied music at Wayne State University in Detroit? How funny - his best friend Brian was going there in the fall to study music!

In the fall, Kelly could not wait to meet Brian because he was the gateway to Shawn. In fact, she included, "You're Shawn's friend!" in their very first conversation.  Brian indeed was Shawn's friend, and he was funny and liked good music except when it comes to Needtobreathe but that's mostly because he's jealous of Bear.

1998, y'all.

One day, after having discussed their mutual love for the band Sunny Day Real Estate and the upcoming sold out show to which Brian had a ticket and Kelly did not, Brian turned to Kelly and handed her his concert ticket.  He said, "The Lord told me to give this to you."  Kelly, thinking he said "Laura told me ..." answered back, "Well, does she want any money for it?" (This would foreshadow years of amazing communication skills and Kelly's bat-like sense of hearing.) Upon learning the origin of the gift was a suggestion of Jesus and not Laura, Kelly's first thought was, "The Lord talks to you? Whatever, Psycho." (This did not stop her from accepting the gift and has fully cemented the life long philosophy that if people offer you free stuff you want, you should undoubtedly take it, because it might just lead to love, marriage, and a baby (or four) in a baby carriage.)

Kelly went to the concert and, more importantly, learned the Lord actually talks to everyone. She eventually learned to listen.

Brian wooed Kelly with pick up line gems like, "I'm Brian, the Other White Meat."  This was the height of the Great Pork Campaign (editor note: I don't remember that being a *thing* either) and was delivered with just enough ridiculousness to make it awesome and win her heart.

Brian and Kelly were engaged in June of 1999 and would rather die a thousand deaths than plan a wedding again.  If either of them kicks the bucket, the other solemnly swears to remarry only by eloping.  (But only the kind of eloping to which everyone is invited.)(But with no planning involved.)(Like, "Hey, what are you doing right now? Come watch us get married.  Then maybe we'll all go to Taco Bell.")(Because they are classy.)

Shower #1

Shower #2

Kelly enjoyed three wedding showers, while poor Brian only got to show up at the end and collect the gifts to transport home.  He did make out pretty well at the second shower, where his parents gave them a weedwacker, garbage cans, and a grill. And also maybe at the bachelorette party because, let's be real, most of those gifts were really for him anyway.

The wedding was beautiful mainly because Kelly's mom is an Ebay Master.  It rained, but hey, you can't buy everything on Ebay. To this day Brian can not tell you one detail about his wedding ceremony or the reception that followed, but since that is obviously a result of him being beyond in love with his bride, he is given a pass on the memories of the Day That Changed Bettered His Life Forever. Good thing there are so many pictures to jog that memory.

From left: Jackie, Lisa, Eboni, Ringbearer Grifin, MOH/sister Cassie, Kelly, Brian, BM Kevin, Super Cute Boy Shawn (isn't it ironic?)(don'tcha think?), Lauren's Hubby David, and little brother Steve. (And dude, it was totally 2001.)

Twelve years in pictures: (don't worry; it's greatly summarized)

July 1999 Engaged
"Awwww"

Eve is born and Hosanna is due to arrive in less than two months.
2004

Hosanna is born with a dainty birth weight of eleven pounds, three ounces.
2004 

Esther joins the family.
2007

A boy?! Ezra joins the brood.
Brian hates this picture.
Maybe because Kelly made him wear that shirt.
Probably.
2010

The whole family at Disney World.
2012

And they lived happily ever after.

Hangovers and Races and Needing To Breathe

Lesson of the day:  The best way to handle those who are not naturally morning people is to treat them as if they are hungover.  Even if they are not.  Because they kind of are - they are still working off the effects of the previous evening.  So while you might think it's quite natural to be boisterous and loud as heck upbeat and cheerful first thing in the morning (even after only 4 hours sleep), and maybe even assume your demeanor in the dawn light is an admirable quality, that is not always the case.

Such was the lesson on a Saturday morning.

After the wonderment of NEEDTOBREATHE, Lauren and I drove off into the sunset (okay, it was like 1:30 in the morning) with one thing on our minds: McDonalds.  We drove to three or four before we found one open at that hour.  I was all, "The heck? This side of town cares a lot about making healthy choices hates freedom and doesn't want their citizens to have access to a 2:00 a.m. McFlurry.  What kind of fascism is this?"  But through perseverance we found a drive thru to meet our needs and settled into the parking lot to nosh and chat.  It felt a lot like high school, except without the "I hope I don't get caught" aspect.  Because, you know, I'm the mom now.

I slept over at Lauren's house (furthering the whole "high school" feel) because the next morning we were going to run a 5k together. We went to bed around 2:45-ish. Lauren was going to wake me at 7:45.  This is how that went.

Lauren (hesitant and gravelly voiced): Kel? It's morning.

Kelly: GOOOOOOOOD MORNING VIETNAM!!! (Okay, it was really like, "Good morning!" peppered with two stories of things that had happened during the three hours we had been apart and sleeping.)(One was that my phone died a slow and vocal death between 5:00 - 5:40 a.m.)(The second was that I woke up in a panic because we were *obviously* late because I was much too rested to have only slept our allotted time, so I sneaked downstairs to find a clock because my phone was dead, but I didn't want to disturb Diamond the dog and/or David the husband, but it was only 6:11 a.m.)(I shared both stories in my usual manner and ended with, "Cool, I think Imma take a shower.")(Lauren looked at me in awe bewilderment and went back to bed.)

I only noticed a difference in our morning personalities when I was standing at the toaster (singing a made up song in my head of "toastin' some toast in the toooooaaaaster ... gonna put on some peanut buuuuuuutter") and Lauren said, "Are you always this happy in the morning?" and I was like, "Yes." This was when I realized Lauren had a Not A Morning Person Hangover and I should probably chill the heck out and eat my toast respectfully.

We drove to my mom's house because that's where we were going to park, but discovered the race was farther away then I previously thought.  We parked closer to the race and walked to get our race packets.  I originally wanted to do the pre-race yoga session they offered, but with our late night and someone's hangover it was probably best we skipped it.

When the race started, I warned Lauren it would be congested and we would both dodge people and have people dodge us.  It thinned out after about a quarter of a mile and was a great run.  It was mainly through neighborhoods and the weather was perfect.  There were two water stations and a lot of volunteers cheering us on.  Since the race benefited mental health awareness and suicide prevention, the course was lined with signs filled with facts and statistics relating to the cause.

I heard the first f-bomb at the Mile 1 marker.  It totally wasn't from Lauren.  She did fantastic.  Her goal was to run the whole thing and she did.  She even sprinted to the finish line.  I still haven't found our official results anywhere, but the sprint to the finish was to beat 40 minutes, so, accounting for our starting place in the mob of racers, I'll bet we averaged about a 11:45ish mile. I am so happy and proud she did it! The next obvious step is to convince her to do Warrior Dash.

Yeah we totally just ran a 5k. #selfiesatthefinish

Also, because this is super fun, here is a picture my friend Meggan tagged me in on Facebook.  She found it on the Royal Oak Music Theatre FB page from the night Needtobreathe played.  Photo is by Joe Gall Photography.

Front row? Check.  Huge smiles? Check.  Looking like I'm naked?  Aaaand check.

A whole night where I am reminded that I can't dance (and lessons on how to fake it 'til you make it)

There is this band called Needtobreathe that I kinda sorta like and loosely keep tabs on.

Sike.

I am an obsessed super fan who pays actual money (in a world where money usually buys things like, I don't know, food and diapers) to belong to their fan club and have first dibs on ticket sales and insider news.  It is totally worth it.  Dinner is overrated.

I have been planning to see Needtobreathe on their Drive All Night Tour since before I knew it existed.  I didn't start making concrete plans (like what I was going to wear) until the dates had been announced.  I got tickets immediately because I know people pre-order them.  

Friday night was the big night.  I prepared by barely sleeping and then painting my toenails.

A lovely shade called "What are you - fifteen?!" (I read something on the internet about the shape of your toes revealing your heritage.) (According to the internet - which never lies - I'm totally Egyptian.) (Which explains why every time I participate in a dance off I end up walking like one.) (#80'skid)
(Raise your hand if you read that hashtag with the word skid in it.)
(You are a true 80's kid if you read "skid" and thought of pants.)
(You are normal if you read "skid" and thought of poop.)
(If you read "skid" and thought of tire marks, you are probably a bad driver.)

Brian came home early and I scurried to get dressed.  This caused a minor panic because the outfit I had been planning on wearing for months was no longer appropriate for the weather. I thought I could pull it off anyway but it was almost 80 degrees in Michigan in May. (WTHeck, weather?  Didn't you get the memo that Needtobreathe was coming and I needed to wear that super cute dress with my brown jacket and boots?)  I threw together an outfit just to get out the door on time.  Traffic is no joke on that side of town (I can hear my California readers laughing already, "Bless her heart, she has no idea what traffic is really like, how cute...") and I was going to meet Lauren for dinner before the show.

Aside from a ridiculous amount of gawker delay (for real - who hasn't seen an abandoned car with no tire chilling out on the shoulder before?) and a moment where I almost wet my pants because I pee when I am nervous/stressed/excited the ride was uneventful.  I parked my car and walked past the venue to go to eat and the line was already around the block and down the street.  I was weirdly proud (I mean, these have been my boys for years)(way before anyone else ever heard of them)(*pushes up nerd glasses, adjusts ironic t-shirt, and takes instagram picture of an iced coffee and bagel belt*) and I was not freaking out about the line because I had Special Insider Priority Access.

Lauren and I ate the most disappointing dinner ever at a crepe place ("What, Kel? A crepe dinner in suburban Detroit was not up to par?" Shocking, I know.)(Don't worry, we totally made up for it with a 2:00 a.m. McDonald's run.)  At the theater we got in our Special Insider Priority Access line at about 7:15 p.m.  We were about fourth in line for 8:00 doors. I felt slightly bad for the people that showed up at noon for front row that did not have Priority Access, but not enough to give up my spot. Don't hate the player ...

This picture was stolen borrowed from NTB's facebook page.  It was taken by @niklpro on Instagram. The fancy work in Paint was done by yours truly. Don't be too jealous. 

Proof.
Proof I'm up front and proof I don't know how to use my camera.

Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors opened the show at 9:00. (This is how I know I am getting old: around 8:30 I started thinking about how long the night was going to be.  I started doing squats to relieve the pressure on my lower back from standing for so long.  I calculated hours of sleep based on estimated time of arrival in bed. I started wondering why venues didn't offer collapsible stools for patrons who pay good money to wait in the front row. I started resenting the bouncer for getting to rest his tush on the edge of the stage. I wondered if I could ever get a job as a bouncer. I realized I'm a stay at home mom jealous of a bouncer for sitting down.  Aaaannnd = age fully realized.)

Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors - Rich, Ellie, Drew, and Nathan

We saw Drew Holcomb at the last NTB show.  Drew Holcomb was solo then, because he was filling in last minute and the rest of his band was back in Tennessee.  Lauren bought me three of their cd's and I really like them.  I was looking forward to seeing the whole band perform. They did not disappoint.  The guitarist, Nathan Dugger, is sick talented, and looks like Jim from The Office.  He also plays keyboards and the boy knows music. Ellie is Drew's wife and they are lovely together.  They did a duet and shared one mic and it was poignant.  I would see them headline.

Needtobreathe went on around 10:00.  They opened semi-acoustically, with a bass drum and a few percussion instruments, an upright bass, and a few guitars.  It was different, because usually they open big with one of their anthem-like songs.  It worked though, and three songs in when the curtain behind them dropped and revealed the rest of the stage everyone freaked the heck out and rocked out with them.

Photo courtesy of Josh Drake Photography because all my pics are terrible.

They played a ton of my favorites. I danced and sang my heart out. (Confession = whenever I am singing and catch one of the band member's eyes, I become totally focused on singing the correct words and always mess them up. Every.single.time. So now, as a preventative, if I catch their eye I fake sneeze or itch my nose, effectively hiding my mouth.)(I'm pretty sure NTB thinks I have the worst allergies ever.)

(*Also, a confession for fun = since I was a music major in college, I am pretty in tune (*giggle*) with my own voice. So I know that I absolutely can not "WOOOOO!" at all.  It doesn't matter if it's a sporting event I'm cheering on, a concert I am celebrating ... my "WOOO!" is thin and pathetic. But in the spirit of The Articulation of Excitement, I totally lip sync a "WOOOO!" whenever other people are screaming it.)(The secret is in the commitment to the "WOOOO!" facial expression.)(So if you suck at "WOOOO!"-ing, feel free to use my trick.)(Nobody ever knows you're faking it.)(You're welcome.)

Needtobreathe played for a good two hours. It was a fantastic show; maybe even their best so far.  How does a frequently touring band keep their music and live show so fresh? They are just amazing.

And after the show this happened.

I'd like to be all, "I'm not really that short in real life," but um, I'm totally that short in real life.

Lauren, ROCK LEGEND Bear Rinehart, and me.

I can't catch my breath because I ...

NEEDTOBREATHE!!!!!

If you missed the post(s) about my experiences with ROCK LEGENDS Needtobreathe, you should probably read my first one here to fully understand all that I am saying when I declare the following:

I am going to see Needtobreathe tonight.

Don't wait up, y'all.

I'm Walkin' On Sunshine, OH-OH

And don't it feel good? HEY! ALL RIGHT NOW!

I've been given an award.  And I have it on good authority that it is a Major Award.  You know, of the leg lamp variety.  Katie at Nested has nominated me for the Sunshine Award because she is hilarious and one of my favorite bloggers in the world.  (Not because she nominated me but because she just is.)(And she is doing an incredible give away so you should check it out and follow her.)

“The Sunshine Award is an award given by bloggers to other bloggers. The receivers of the Sunshine Award are bloggers who positively and creatively inspire others in the blogsphere.”

The requirements for this award are to write 7 facts about myself and nominate others for this award.  Because I'm so great at following blogging rules (*sarcasm font*), sit back while I make five facts seem like seven.

Seven Five Facts About Me

1.  Ever since I accidently high-fived another swimmer underwater I'm the most fun swimmer ever. (Yeah, the most fun ever - you wanna go, Grammar?)  One day a guy was swimming towards me in the adjoining pool lane and we both stroked underwater at the same time, resulting in an accidental high-five and it was rad.  We both agreed we were pretty much best friends after that happened, and by "best-friends" I mean we laughed and for real high-fived at the end of our workouts.  At that moment I realized that just because swimming has the reputation of being a loner sport, it doesn't mean you can't communicate with the swimmers around you.  So I spend a fair amount of lap swimming making whale noises to see if anyone can hear me.  I also sometimes sing, but whale noises are much easier, because, you know, I'm swimming underwater.

If there was ever a moment I knew Pinterest would never fail me, it's the moment I discovered this shirt under the section of Humor (thankfully, and not under, you know, Women's Fashions). Pinterest, it's like you know me.

2.  I have super fine body hair.  And not like, "Dayum gurl, that some fine body hair," but like, "Wow, your body hair is super blonde and very small in thickness." This really works in my favor because along with being really fine, it also 'fros out like nobodies business.  In the right light I look like I have an aura about me, but it's really the light reflecting off my standing at attention arm hair.

What I really wanted to find was a
picture of Kid Rock drinking Faygo,
but apparently Kid Rock is mostly
photographed drinking beer. Which
is a bummer for this blog post.

3. I think that my feelings involving 1.the music of Kid Rock and 2. the taste of Faygo pop are going to get me kicked out of Michigan.  Both of these are Michigan staples.  Now, I love me some Better Made potato chips, I drive a Chrysler, Brian drives a Ford, and I happily add an "s" to the end of every place I am going.  (Don't worry if you don't get the pluralization thing.  It's actually a possessive thing, mostly.  No one in Michigan shops at Meijer, we all shop at Meijers.  Or Krogers. I don't get it either.) I'm totally a homegrown girl.  But I want to punch Kid Rock in the face every time I hear All Summer Long.  Or Picture (Sheryl Crow - blech).  I actually like Bawitdaba because I feel personally challenged to scream, "My name is Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiid," just as long as he does.  I think he's smart and well spoken, and I would probably vote for him if he ran for any type of government position*, but I just don't like his music.  I'm also feeling really defensive right now. I also hate Faygo pop especially the Red pop and I'm writing this little because them's fighting words in the mitten.

*I heard an interview with Kid Rock on Detroit politics and it was so spot on.  For those of you that are unfamiliar with Kwame Kilpatrick and the Detroit City Council, let me summarize with this:  You know how politicians are known for being slimy, corrupt, evil people?  Normal politicians describe Detroit politicians this way.  Kid Rock fully admits that he is not qualified to serve as mayor of Detroit but did suggest he would run if they created a position for the Czar of Common Sense.  Can I get an AMEN?

(3.5 An interesting fact that has nothing to do with me but is for free?  This is Kid Rock.

This is the lead singer of my favorite band in the whole world, Bear Rinehart of Needtobreathe.

Sometimes I have to look twice at pictures to determine if it's Bear or Kid Rock.)(Which makes me feel like a slacker fan.)(#firstworldproblems.)

Hanging in my kitchen -
Holly Hobbie celebrating
Mother's Day 1974.  Boom.

4. I'm nutso about vintage Holly Hobbie.  My sister wives have gotten me some sweet gifts over the years to start and grow my collection.  Shontaya gave me a vintage book that I was afraid to open for forever and then thought, "This is totally stupid; I'm just wasting this," and so I cut out the pictures and framed them.  Because looking at them makes me happy all you people who just freaked out that I cut up a vintage book.  Rachel gave me decorative plates; Lauren got me a plaque, and Lyndsay got me a plate and made Hosanna a baby doll blanket and baby doll diaper bag out of Holly Hobbie material.  I am so spoiled.

I'd like chocolate cake please, Mrs. Huxtable.

5. My birthday is June 19.  Along with frequently sharing my birthday with Father's Day (every.dang.year.)  I also share a birthday with Paula Abdul.  And Macklemore.  WHAAAA?  Also, Phylicia Rashad, better known as Mrs. Claire Huxtable.  I think this year we all (me and my celebrity birthday twins) need to celebrate together. (I mean, you can totally come, too.)(I just didn't want you to feel obligated like you had to come to my birthday party.)(Just follow me on Bloglovin or Google Friend Connect and that will be gift enough for me.) But Paula, Macklemore, and Mrs. Freaking Huxtable - can you imagine that party?

I am nominating (in no particular order)
1. Stephanie @ That Loud Redhead
2. Kate @ Widgeon Nest
3. Angela @ Honey, I Shrunk the Mom
4. Alma @ Can I Borrow That?
5. Sue @ Limefreckle
6. Sue @ Diapers ... or Wine?
7. Jenn @ Fat Chick 2 Fit Chick

Also, since it's FRIDAY! it's also time for a bit of housekeeping.  I know most of you follow me on Facebook (which I'm really thankful for, YOU are awesome), but I need more followers on Bloglovin or Google Friend Connect.  (Yes, GFC is going to disappear soon, but won't it be nice to add Sublurban Mama to your collection before we all have to move?) So follow me on Bloglovin or GFC - it's totally free and won't take but a second of your time.  Plus you get live, up-to-date notifications whenever I post as long as you check Bloglovin or your reader feed. It's like the gift that keeps on giving. Just click on this fancy button and follow the steps.  Or glance to the right of my blog and click on "Join this Site" with Google Friend Connect.  Boo-ya, done.