I immediately stopped cleaning and started googling contractors, because I'm pretty sure the only way to handle that situation is to do a complete remodel.
Then Esther, in a fantastic display of noise and destruction, grabbed on to the curtains in the living room and swung her full kindergarten body weight from them. She was all, "I'M HAVING A CIRCUS!" and then freaked the heck out when her performance ripped the front window curtains and rod completely out of the wall. Homegirl even bent the anchors that were holding them in place. Because we homeschool, I'm calling it a chance physics lesson, and am using this as yet another example of why homeschooling works, y'all.
Last week I called Brian in a panic because something is in our attic and you'd better come home and kill it because if you don't I'm leaving with the kids because I'm not waiting around here for what I'm pretty sure is a pterodactyl to claw it's way through the ceiling and find me and eat my face off. Brian thought I was being "ridiculous" and maybe a bit "dramatic" and maybe even questioned the validity of my claim that there was even anything really in the attic. Could it perhaps just be the hail outside pounding on the roof? Um, unless hail responds to me banging on the ceiling with my broom and yelling, "DUDE! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" by ceasing to claw/chew the attic framework and scurrying (*gag*) away from my aggressive broom wielding, then, no, it wasn't just the hail.
Two nights ago Brian and I were in bed at the end of a long day when right above our heads I heard our little friend. I waited silently, and sure enough, Brian finally conceded that he heard it as well but it was probably just a little mouse
After all the perils of a life spent owning this house I've decided the only logical conclusion is to move. Because if we stay we have to deal with all the above problems and this one from almost a year ago:
|"Kel, no way is the Super Nanny hole still in the wall."|
Believe it, my friend. And with the original piece of paper still covering it up.
(Some more "housekeeping" *giggle*. Someday soon the doomsday prophets have foretold that Google Reader will be gone. I love and appreciate dearly every one of my readers and don't want to lose anyone. I've signed up with Bloglovin and you can follow me there. It's as easy as a click on the button. Will you do it for me? Pretty please and thank you.)